Turns out my reinvention of the wheel is complete crap. Neanderthal I am not, knitter with resources I am. Luckily I have the Interweave Knits everyone references when talking about Intarsia in the Round. I gotta say maybe given a long winter above the arctic circle I would have figured out how to really do intarsia in the round, but otherwise I just don't think I would have thought of it.
If anyone wants a totally bonk method of intarsia in the round, I am more than happy to oblige.